The Bad News: A column blew apart at the Old Vic.

Column kablooey

The Good News: It’s an added column and only a “little bit” structural.
The Bad News: It’s a “little bit” structural because the box beam above it has deteriorated (because of the previously existing box gutters) so even though it’s just a “little” necessary…it IS necessary.
The Good News: I have replacements. They are better quality, not TERRIBLY expensive, and I’ve already sealed them on the inside.

New Columns

The Bad News: I’m not ready to put the new ones in yet as I need to rebuild the beam when I do.
The Good News: I have a BIG bottle of glue.


AND a nail gun:

The Bad News: Well…I have a nail gun around here somewhere…

Mmmm…just where did THAT get off to?

The Good News: I can probably put it back together.
The Bad News: It’s rotten at the bottom so will not be a long term replacement. Also, it’s been coming apart at the seams long enough that due to warping etc it’s not going back together cleanly without removing it from the house and applying a metric-shit-ton of force.
The Good News: I found my knife and was using it to clean old glue and caulk off the joints.
The Bad News: It’s a cheap Chinese Knife and broke.

Cheap Chinese Knife

The Good News: The knife is repairable.
The Bad News: It broke in such a way as to cut the heck out of me and HELL WILL FREEZE OVER before I put this piece of crap back together again.
The Good News: It made a VERY satisfying “clunk” when I dead-centered it in the trash can from 30 yards.
The Bad News: Bleeding dilutes wood glue.
The Good News: Wood glue makes a quite good coagulant.


The Bad News: This thing ain’t fitting without a metric shit-ton (that’s an imperial ass-load) of force.

Among other problems…it wasn’t sealed internally when installed.

The Good News: If there’s ONE thing I excel at…it’s applying a metric shit-ton of force.

That’ll do donkey, that’ll do.

The Bad News: The porch project has been at a standstill for a LONG while due to my quest to get my health back (mainly, my shoulders) as well as the 2016 series of storms that cost us near a year’s income in uninsured losses.
The Good News: It’s time to get back to work.

Note: This is a temporary fix. This column is slated for replacement. I will be rebuilding the curved box-beam above it and have new columns for that install. 1st though…I have to finish the OTHER side of the porch and the curved box-beam there.

I’ll see you on the road.
Daniel Meyer